The Girl Who Loved TV
A girl named Tillie loved TV.
They called her "Little Square Eyes"
When Oprah came on, or a good movie,
she looked like she was paralyzed.
She watched it from the time she woke.
She basked in its warm blue glow.
And even when the cable broke,
she loved the TV snow.
Flatscreen HD, or black and white,
or old school with rabbit ears,
Tillie loved the tube, the surreal light.
The sitcoms brought her to tears.
Her mother said, You're going blind,
my little couch potato.
If you keep watching, your little mind
will putrefy to Play-Doh.
But I love cartoons all through the day
and talk shows afternoons,
at night when sleeping I hear it play
the latest music tunes.
When I grow up I'm going to be
a television scientist.
I'll build the world a huge TV
whose screen will be the giant-est.
The astronauts can watch March Madness
or old school Looney Tunes.
From there on out they'll have no sadness
when walking on the moon.
Her mother said, Go out and play.
You've had enough cartoons.
You need real thoughts within your brain,
not empty thought balloons.
But, Tillie cried, The Amazing Race
can keep me fit and safer.
Animal Planet's a harmless place
for getting close to nature.
Her mother screamed, This Plug-in-Drug
is killing you, my daughter.
You need to get up off that rug
and ride a teeter-totter.
Don't fear to run and skin your knees,
or slide down waterfalls.
Life's full of possibilities
like golf or frogs or dolls.
The TV's something you'll regret,
it turns your brains to mush.
You need to learn your alphabet
and read. I've had enough!
She snatched away the remote control
and pointed to outside.
So Tillie took a nature stroll.
What would Oprah do? she cried.
I know the T stands for television.
Who cares about the V?
The alphabet's for losers, isn't
it? she asked a bee.
The bee would understand her queries,
the nature of her world.
No need for words or dictionaries.
Just like a TV girl!
This honeybee has two antennae
mounted on its head
and thousands of eyes instead of an eye
just like a TV set!
The bee was shocked to be equated
to tedious television.
I work the fields all day, she stated.
I'm always on a mission.
A bee makes honey, bees make hives,
and bees can fly for hours.
And if we tire of touring the skies,
we pollinate the flowers.
I may not be first in the alphabet,
but don't insult my kind.
Bees always read when going to bed.
How else improve your mind?
What's more our wings unfold like pages
of a tiny, fragile book.
We've been this way throughout the ages.
Come closer, take a look.
Because her eyesight was so bad
Tillie moved a little too close.
She bumped the bee, the bee got mad
and stung her on the nose.
She ran home crying, burst through the door
and right on through the kitchen.
She crumpled on the living room floor,
and hugged the television.
Oh, television, you're the best,
she cried. I've really missed you.
I promise that there's no one else,
and now it's time I kissed you.
Her mother screamed, she called the news,
she called the police and fireman.
They sent their trucks and two camera crews.
You should have heard the sirens.
The strongest policeman couldn't pry
away her toes or fingers.
But at least the firemen with jaws of life
removed the poison stinger.
The thing that stopped her loud boohoosó
she saw the cameras there.
Oh Mom, I'm going to be on the news,
Hurry, come fix my hair.
And to this day she lies on the sofa
watching her DVD.
She plays the newsclip over and over
of the night she was on TV.
Sent as a joke to The International Library of Poetry
