A Lament to the World
O world, I see you've become weary.
Your lives belie the drab and dreary.
The zest of youth replaced with dread
As mundane chores compress each head.
Awake each heart! Rekindle fire!
Bring forth the dance and joyous choir!
For still remains the remedy—
Tis Peeps in pure simplicity.
O mankind! Do tastebuds rot?
Once truth we knew, but now forgot.
As babes we ripped the three pack wide
To claim the chicks that lay inside.
We thot not of debts and wars
As we unleashed our 'mallow whores.
Fresh or stale or squished compact
We chewed until our jawbones cracked.
Remember sucking sugar grit
Off each small head before you bit?
You did not dwell on pain or grief
But only, only sweet relief
For fears would melt like sun-drenched snow
As you inhaled each triplet row.
The hands of time would cease to spin,
The sugar buzz would soar within.
O precious globs of fat free wonder
Do you know defilement is asunder?
Bunnies three line up in boxes,
Surplant our chicks like fiendish foxes.
For lo, real Peeps, the wise know true
Are neither pink nor white nor arctic blue.
Tis yellow chick with pinpoint eyes
For which each heart and soul now cries.
Shed now, O throng, your wretched state
And stack those chickies on your plate.
Gorge your cheeks with sugar goo then
Stuff some in your neighbor, too.
Spread wide those chicks in yonder lands
Around the globe to outstretched hands.
Behold! And watch as troubles fall
As Peeps on earth doth conquer all!
Sent as a joke to The League of American Poets
