The Ideal Budweiser Customer Watches a Budweiser Commercial
Oh shit I love "Landslide"
I was going to get up to piss but then I heard me some Fleetwood Mac.
Hey that's a pretty farm, too. Farms are dope.
Wait, oh goddamn it it's a baby horse lying in some fucking sawdust.
That baby horse is so cute I can't even handle it right now.
I am literally unsure how to proceed.
And now the horse is being fed from a bottle?
The hell am I supposed to do with that?
Dammit now the horse and the dude are playing and stuff.
Fuck me if I don't love a playful goddamn horse.
Look! A Budweiser truck. Budweiser!
I should like this brand on Facebook.
I should follow this brand on Twitter.
I really should make an effort to engage
with this brand on social media.
Wait, that's a horse trailer. And our dude
is shaking hands with the driver? Is he—
DUDE YOU CAN'T SELL THAT FUCKING HORSE!
YOU'RE GOING TO MISS HIM SO MUCH!
He's your FROLICKING BUDDY!
What the HELL, bro?
Bum me out.
Uh-oh: CLYDESDALE PARADE! In a CITY!
And there's our guy! And could that possibly be—
aww MAN the horse didn't see our dude
because he's wearing blinders.
This commercial makes me want to kill myself.
BUT WAIT.
YOU PUT THAT FORD F150 KING RANCH
BACK IN PARK THIS INSTANT
BECAUSE HERE COMES YOUR HORSE
in SLOW MO HD GALLOPING
DOWN the FUCKING STREET
because he remembered you.
Somebody get me a Budweiser.
