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Where Pixies Relax
In thickets so thick That the crickets get cricks In their necks when they flex Is where Pixies relax. So complex and compact Are the sticks they're betwixt, Even ticks say a trek Through such tracts is a tax. Friction nicks insect knickers And hacks up their slacks. Prickly parts…
We’re Sorry
For horseshoes press 1, for hand grenades press 2 Please spell the name of the person whose name you are spelling Please hang your clothes on the line We're sorry, the number you have dialed is your own number We're sorry, we can’t come to the phone any more. If…
My Tenure (Clock Signal: The Aftermath)
It is my 10-year anniversary today, They remind me. I am being Rewarded for my Tenure. I am discreetly removed from the production floor. I am taken for the mandatory photo, for my certificate. We pose in front of The Corporate Video of The Gleefully Dancing Suits. We don't wear…
Winter 2019: The De-Evolution of the Snow Day
Snow Day #1 Friday, December 14 Alarm clocks are silenced. School closings scroll across the television like answered prayers. Aromas: fresh coffee, hot chocolate, homemade soup. Snuggling on the couch, followed by several good runs on the toboggan down the hills at Old Man Fisher's Farm. Cozy children in matching…
Visiting Empire Haven
A naturist resort in Moravia*, New York We're going to make the nudist scene; we'll cast off our garments and stroll on the green. Genitals bared, we will lie in the sun and stroke through the water with every-stripped-one, near a town, named for Europe's, from whose shtetl came a…
Lewis Carroll’s Song at Newark Airport
Despite the wealth of words I spent, There's little to relate. I saw a Delta flight agent A-sitting by the gate. “I raced to make it here by noon!” I cried. “My flight's delayed?” But the agent laughed just like a loon And made me quite dismayed. “Your flight has…
This Film Has Been Edited for Content
On basic cable, the killer skulks in his shadowy clothes and oversized hat into the desolate building, up the dark steps as nondiegetic cellos play, and just before he blows out his victim's brains— spaghetti sauce slung across a pale wall— he whispers, “I've had it with your plucking spit!”…
At a Meeting of the Queer Women Filmmaker’s Association
At a meeting of the Queer Women Filmmaker's Association (hosted bi-annually) I propose a new project: a lesbian Twilight remake, Working title: Twidykes, colon, Gold Star. The crowd boos. First objection, from my ex, She says that I am not qualified to head this passion project because I have “neither…
Failure to Triangulate
I don't know who Jason is, but I know he recently suffered a serious injury or illness. I know this because I was assigned his old phone number. As soon as the number transfers to me I receive heartfelt texts from strangers asking someone named Jason how he is feeling,…
Sarah Totton
Sarah Totton is thrilled to receive her second honorable mention in the Wergle Flomp Humor Poetry Contest. She is a regular contributor to McSweeney's Internet Tendency and Points in Case. Her humor has also appeared in Slackjaw, Little Old Lady Comedy, and The Belladonna. She has twice received a dishonorable…
Eylie Sasajima
Eylie Sasajima is a recent high school graduate who lives in the rural town of Spring Grove, Pennsylvania. Poetry and fiction are her main creative outlets. She is a former poetry contributor to her school's newspaper, The Rocket Star. Her writing process is influenced by world history, media, social justice…
Linda Muhlhausen
Linda Johnston Muhlhausen believes in the humanist potential of language in general, and poetry in particular. She takes inspiration from observation of the world around her, other poems and poets, the synergy derived from a cat attached to her lap and a poster attached to the wall. The poster of…
Melissa Morano
After graduating from the University of Vermont and majoring in Political Science and Religion, Melissa Morano lived in New York, working in finance and not getting nearly enough sleep. Her growing disinterest and discomfort with the current political climate in the United States have led her to undertake a self-imposed…
Shawn Klimek
Shawn M. Klimek is the middle child of seven creative siblings, a globetrotting, US military spouse, internationally best-selling short-story writer and butler to a Maltese. His poetry can be read in the digital magazines NewMyths, Dastaan World, Pendora, and Inner Circle Writers, and in the print anthologies Cadence, Windows, Cocky…
Lee Kisling
Lee Kisling is a 2014 graduate of Hamline University in Saint Paul, Minnesota. In December 2013, his poetry chapbook The Lemon Bars of Parnassus was published by Parallel Press in Madison, Wisconsin. His work has been published by Stoneboat, Sixfold, Oberon, Bryant Literary Review, Off the Coast, and many others.
Jackie Hostetler
Jackie Hostetler is a mother, a teacher and a writer. When not mothering or teaching, she spends her time writing, usually about mothering and teaching. Language has always been her passion, particularly the process of how humans acquire language. Most of her professional career has been centered around encouraging language;…
David Galef
David Galef has published over a dozen books, including the novel How to Cope with Suburban Stress (one of Kirkus's Best 30 Books of 2006); the short-story collection My Date with Neanderthal Woman (Dzanc Books' Short Story Collection Award); two children's books, The Little Red Bicycle (Random House) and Tracks…
Jo Angela Edwins
Jo Angela Edwins is a poet, English professor, animal lover, and avid jokester. She was born and raised in the Augusta, Georgia, area and earned a BA at Augusta University and an MA and PhD at the University of Tennessee. She currently lives in Florence, SC, where she teaches poetry…
Henry Crawford
Henry Crawford's work has appeared in several journals and online publications including Boulevard, Copper Nickel and The Southern Humanities Review. His first collection of poetry, American Software, was published in 2017 by CW Books. His poem “Blackout” was selected by the Southern Humanities Review as a finalist in the 2018…
Zach Klebaner
Zach Klebaner is a recent graduate from Hofstra University where he earned his B.A. in Film Studies and Production and took a lot of naps. In between his naps, he managed to create an open mic for student artists to connect and showcase their work, co-produce an improvisational theater troupe…
Taylor Richard
Taylor (better known as her stage name, Valerie R.) is a former Georgia peach currently living in Portland, OR with her community of friends and pets. She is a professional caregiver for people with developmental disabilities and a student of business. She enjoys public libraries, femme culture, long runs on…
Jody Mason
Jody Mason earned her BA in Literature-Creative Writing from UC Santa Cruz, and she has published feature pieces in Delicious Living Magazine, NewHope360.com, and EmbraceYourUnicorn.com. She is a member of the Boulder Writing Studio in Boulder, Colorado, where she currently resides. Her work can be found at www.CriminySakesAlive.com, a personal…
Wergle Flomp Humor Poetry Contest 2019
Congratulations to the winners of our 2019 humor poetry contest!
WordTips Guide to Grammar and Punctuation
Student-friendly overview of grammar rules
Memories of You
By Gregory Ashe
new heat
By Frank Prem
Diode Editions Book & Chapbook Contests
Open to all poets. Translations, collaborations, and hybrid work are all welcome
Subscriber News: July 2019
Recent honors and publications earned by our newsletter subscribers
Doubleback Review
Sundress Publications journal will only publish previously-published work from journals that no longer exist
Wordsworth
Free anachronism-detecting program for historical fiction writers
How To Get Great Book Reviews Frugally and Ethically by Carolyn Howard-Johnson
Book reviews form the base for a successful marketing campaign that builds the readership you need for a prosperous writing career
Subscriber News: June 2019
Recent honors and publications earned by our newsletter subscribers
Writer Beware’s Guide to Selecting Reputable Literary Agents
Guidelines for weeding out agent scams
American Writers Museum: Literary Links
Website of Chicago-based literary history museum offers links to contests, book festivals, and literary societies
Soma Mei Sheng Frazier
Soma Mei Sheng Frazier is the final judge of our Tom Howard/Margaret Reid Poetry Contest. Soma's third prose chapbook, Don't Give Up on Alan Greenspan, was selected as the winner of CutBank's 2018 contest and released in 2019. Her previous fiction chapbooks—Salve (Nomadic Press) and Collateral Damage: A Triptych (RopeWalk…
Walking Backward
By Diana Anhalt
Elegy Between Middle Age and Death
By Trina Porte
Creative Commons
Searchable database of over 300 million public domain and stock photo images
The Day’s Heat by Roberta George
The Day’s Heat won a first prize in the Impress Books Contest put on by Exeter University in England
The Masters Review Flash Fiction Contest
The Masters Review is accepting your previously unpublished stories of 1,000 words or less to be considered for the $3,000 Flash Fiction Prize
Sheila-Na-Gig Editions Poetry Manuscript Contest
Entries are read through a blind submission process by Hayley Mitchell Haugen, Founder & Editor, Sheila-Na-Gig online & Sheila-Na-Gig Editions
Subscriber News: May 2019
Recent honors and publications earned by our newsletter subscribers
September’s First Monday
By Charlotte Mandel
Rare Children’s Books Digital Archive at the Library of Congress
Classic out-of-print books digitized for public access
Into the Drowning Deep
By Mira Grant
London Undercurrents
By Joolz Sparkes and Hilaire
Six of Crows
By Leigh Bardugo
The Witch Boy
By Molly Knox Ostertag
How to Survive a Summer
By Nick White
No Ashes in the Fire
By Darnell L. Moore
