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Mark Orr
Mark Orr is a native Southerner, born in Alabama, reared in Tennessee. He has a BA in British History from the University of Tennessee. He resides near Nashville with one wife and three daughters. He is the editor of Miscellaneous Ramblings Magazine, managing editor of a literary agency (The Star…
The Worst Lamb
I'll begin by saying April stinks. Belladonna, lilacs and hyacinths. All-ee, all-ee, in free: The pub's a-closin'. Sturm und drang, ach, verboten. Rama lama Kama Sutra. My way, my way, Frank Sinatra. Who cares if Mr. Kurtz he dead? Dharma, dharma, Dharma and Greg. Sent as a joke to poetry.com
The Most Exquisite Corpse
Darling, dimpled, explosive posterior! — unless Superman or Big Bird lifts it into the white, fluffy new-fallen snow It was a thumb I saw floating on the slick. (inchoate my pancreas dreaming of your ultrasuede lips, your red hot words: boiled lobster claws, rending my heart) There are no metaphors…
Wilhelmina Hemmingway
Wilhelmina Hemmingway is a pseudonym for a group of poets. These poets are members of Wompo, a discussion list for women's poetry. Each one contributed lines without knowing what the other lines were. Such a poem is called an Exquisite Corpse.
Chipmonks and Chimps
A chicken screams in the distance Perdue is a demi-god Why does mayonaise seem so white Left to his own devices, a monkey with a typewriter can do great things. I've been trying to get frisked. Cops is a great show. Why can't one eat his own filth? Exploring garbage…
David Greaves
David Greaves is a Network Engineer for a telecommunications company in Raleigh, NC.
A Love Letter from Prague, the Capital of Amsterdam
If I were a mongoose, I think I would lick you, Lick you from the grime beneath your toenails To the crevices in your shallow cerebrum You make me feel like a graham cracker on steroids And I like it. I like cheese, too, and April, because April is the…
Megan Gilmore
Megan Gilmore is a resident of Naperville, Ill.
Roses Can Open in the Darkness
Roses can open in the darkness Of the night Hoping she might Love them and thus You Unless Another creature - desire awakens A need to taste - a craving For succulence and beauty Your Feline Leaving stubborn stems and Misplaced petals On your kitchen table Found In the morning…
Rob Daugherty
Rob Daugherty is the “Brilliance-Meister” for the site LetusPonder.com.
Look At The First Letter Of Every Verse, Top To Bottom
Please, oh winter day Once again, I beg you to go away Every day you hound me Today, please be good to me Raspy voices frighten you away Yes…I am getting warm now Do you not understand my feelings? Only time can tell Today time stands still Can you understand…
Lance Muscutt
Mr. Muscutt is a resident of Sequim, WA. He writes, “Another of my 'Poems', entitled 'per aspect', which is absolute rubbish by the way, has recently been selected [by poetry.com] as one of 33 poems to be recorded on a 3 CD set called 'The Sound of Poetry' (of course,…
Dfnnnnnnnnnnnnnn
dfnnnnnnnnnnnnnn bvcxxxxxxxxxx 1`aaaaaaaaaaaadghjkmjkkl; gy4`478890- aS|DsddddddddsBNJMNNN HH HHHHHHHHHHGVGVFF NNN Sent as a joke to poetry.com
Andrew Marty
Andrew's father Yuri writes, “Andrew was born on January 20, 2000 in Auckland, New Zealand. Like a typical two year old he enjoys running, painting and loves ball games. This was the first poem ever written by Andrew and he hasn't written one since. Andrew has not pinned his hopes…
Bottomless Pit
Heaven sends manna in the famine season. Boys discover themselves under willows and in bathrooms, in the mirror. Something deep within them pushes toward the edges of the universe, pen in hand, the voice calling: “Young man, you have been misled. The manna you consume is not from Heaven, but…
Ryan Hoffman
Mr. Hoffmann, age 27, originally from Seattle, resides in Los Angeles in hopes of becoming a Hollywood screenwriter. Petting the Devil, a collection of his poetry, is available for representation. He writes, “I currently attend poetry slams at two locations in Los Angeles, Da Poetry Lounge on Fairfax and Melrose,…
Serenade
When the fingers of day are curling Like a paralytic's digits, and Diana's moon pops out, We all pop out and want to get a little. When we don't, we go home And put on a little Beethoven, And in a Romantic mood, poke out our eardrums, So we amy…
S.M. Hall III
Mr. Hall has been a playwright, radio announcer, chef, mail handler and Poet Laureate of The Hockomock Swamp Rat of Sharon, MA. A graduate of The University of Southern Maine, he won the 1985 Convocation Theme Essay Prize. He is presently a schoolteacher in Tampa, FL and fiction editor of…
To Drift in Sandstone Folds
Soft-footed shadows creep in fossil shades. Beneath the cliffs of Gariwerd the evening Chill exhales in fractured, weathered glades. Folded, tilted memories. Exposed and turning. Our history shelved in countless volumes, etched On rock-bound in earth. Sandstone pages Cradling species crouched below cracked skin— Chronicles of a planet's fading ages.…
Untitled (“bonny, and that is…”)
bonny, and that is “je ne sasi quoi” that unlinges me no need asking why cogitate and meditate on she being fla to the nub she's no sight to obloquy can't feign love when she's eager she by me suits “la dolce vita” pristine love glide my red stream flow…
Eddie Ansah
Mr. Ansah is a resident of Accra, Ghana.
Writing.org: Poetry Scams?
The good news: You’re a winner ...
WritersWeekly Warnings
Names publishers and organizations that writers have had disputes with
Writer Beware Blog
Authors/scam hunters Victoria Strauss and A.C. Crispin give advice on avoiding scam contests, working with editors and agents, and understanding your legal rights
Wocky Jivvy: Poems of Shame
Brave and as yet unsuccessful attempts to write a poem that The National Library of Poetry won’t accept
Warnings and Cautions
Website dedicated to identifying scams
The Flarf Files
“Flarf” is a collaborative poetic technique that creates nonsensical poems from the results of odd Google keyword searches, Internet chat-room lingo, and the “corrosive, cute, or cloying, awfulness” of the amateur poetry that is popular in online forums
ST Literary Agency - writers’ break, or just crooked?
Firstwriter.com advises writers to think carefully before signing with ST Literary Agency
Rip-off Report.com
A good place to check for complaints about contests and publishers
Professor Roy’s Amazingly Bad Poetry Journal
Satirist “Professor Roy” searches Poetry.com for the worst possible poems, and explains just why they’re so bad
Poetry Winner (I & II)
By Jessica Westhead
On Entering Your Poems in Competition
Kurt Heintz advises poets on the kinds of online contests worth entering
Critique Circle
Critique Circle is a free online forum for writers of literary fiction, genre fiction, essays, and articles
Wergle Flomp Poetry Contest Winners
This contest sponsored by Winning Writers pokes fun at the low standards of vanity poetry contests by awarding prizes for poems so bad they’re good
The Godawful Sonnet Generator
Award-winning poet F.J. Bergmann created this random sonnet generator by writing a dozen cliche-ridden sonnets with the same end-rhymes, which the computer program reshuffles to produce over 15 billion unique, dreadful poems
The Family Poet
Hundreds of family-friendly humorous rhyming poems, written and illustrated by R. Wayne Edwards
The Emily Chesley Reading Circle
Where a number of odd ducks gather to celebrate the work of Emily Chesley, Dr. Maximilian Tundra and their Victorian familiars
The Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest
We are straying from poetry here, but it’s worth it
RinkWorks Fun with Words
Explore the freakatorium that is the English language
Ogden Nash (1902-1974)
Master of American light verse
Nonsense Lit
Portal devoted to classic and contemporary nonsense literature
McSweeney’s Internet Tendency: Sestinas
Luscious witty sestinas on topics great and small
MC Nuts: William Wordsworth Rap
This YouTube video reinterprets the 19th-century poet’s famous “Daffodils” as a hip-hop performance
Marie Osmond Performs Dadaist Poetry
In this charming and peculiar video clip, rediscovered at the Lambda Literary website, television personality Marie Osmond reenacts the origins of Dadaism with Hugo Ball’s “sound poem”
Lyttle Lytton Contest
This website collects and publishes the worst first sentences of imaginary novels (and some equally bad quotes from real ones)
LiveJournal: Shakespeare’s Sonnets as Haiku
Hilarious “executive summaries” of the Bard’s first 20 sonnets, which show that he was obsessed with procreation
Lighten Up Online
British quarterly webzine of light verse
Light Quarterly
Pleasant and witty, “a quarterly of light and occasional verse, squibs, satire, puns, and word-play”
Le Jaseroque
Frank L. Warrin’s translation of “Jabberwocky” into French weds nonsense to high culture
Idiots’ Books
Idiots’ Books is a Maryland-based indie press that publishes offbeat, satirical illustrated books featuring the work of writer Matthew Swanson and illustrator Robbi Behr
